088_Page 86Saturday 17. teenth. December. 1842.

Cold, blustering, and disagreeble [sic].

After breakfast, I made all my arrangements, to go up to Chelsea. Did not take Julie, or let her know of my jaunt. Found it cold, and bleak up in that part of the city, the pavements all ice, and snow, while with us they are all clear. I sat with mother, and C. untill near three; found myself in chills, as they do not keep such fires as we do. Henry and Eugene, looking miserable, and complaining as usual; enough to discourage any parent, to look upon, such a complaining, unengergetic progeny. I hope my Boys, will have their fathers undaunted energies, and Indus- trious habits; As for Julie, she will be a bright, sparkling genius I am sure, and will never sit down in listless indolence. Had a long talk with G. in the evening, on a subject very painfull to me. A thousand regrets crush my spirit, when I look back on the past. The mysterious punishments which follow our direlections(1) [sic] from the straight paths of duty, involve us, by our own, and the misconduct of others in sorrows, and regret. An iron band seemed bound around my brain, and sleep alone could restore my peace.
(1) dereliction: willful neglect