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Sunday. 17. Oct. /1852.
Clear, and cool.
All went to Church, but
Julia, I left her at home to write a letter. South.
Mr Hutton gave us an impressive discourse,
from these words,
And the Lord said unto Adam where art thou?”
A question, equally to be applied to each one of us,
on our journey through life.
I did not go out after dinner,
Mr H. went up to see Mr Swherin, who is first re.
covering from a lung sickness.
Louis & Remsen took tea with their Grandmother.
Dressed in their new suits.
I read Julia’s letter to Mr H, he did not like it.
and worried me by anticipated results.
I leave the future, to a wise director, who will
order all things aright; and will not take a
painfull view of every thing.

A failure of skill trying to endure; how many
arrows dipped in poison, can be felt by a sensitive
being. Spiritual, and animal natures do not exist
in unison; there must be strife, and disappointment.

Wednesday. 20th October. /52.
A lovely bright day.
I prepared for exercise to.day.
Took a cold bath as tonic.
Dressed in a black bombazine, large shawl, rode to
down Broadway. Stopped to see Bell, not at home; took
the stage for Mrs Swherin’s, sat an hour with her.
She looked pale, her house in disorder, and every thing,
waiting the painters.
Mr Swherin, much better, came down to his breakfast.
Her little boys quite pretty; I almost envy her the
baby it is so good & fat.
A fine ride home after dinner. Maria & Mrs Gee, had called.
Laid an hour, slept.
Dined, Mr H. came home after dinner. I hoped
to get a ride, but was afraid to venture too late.
Remsen took my place.
I went to walk.
Julia wrote a composition on “King John.” Sat from
four oclock, untill ten, in her room.
I looked over “Uncle Toms cabin” again to look
for faults; find but a few blemishes.
The impression better to.night, style excellent.
Fire in the parlour to.day.
A velvet mantilla for Julia.

Monday. 18. October. 1852.
Clear, and mild, clouds before night.

G. invited me to ride for the benefit
of Charley , who stands in the stable idle.
I was compelled to decline, wishing to do Maria’s [H.}
commission.
Purchased a piece of maroon velvet for her. 6. 6. d
Called at Meyers, took a collar & sleeves; not well
done up.
Mr Leati, gave a lesson.
I went to buy paper with Julia & walk in Broadway.
Mr H. went to ride, has a new Cap, [loaf order.]
The afternoons are too cool for me.

Tuesday. 19. October. / 52.
Clouded, and high winds.

The moschitoes [sic] troubled us last
night, because the weather became moderate.
Mr H. gets up early and is changed
from the sound sleeper, he once was.
Time alters every one, and G does not escape its
silent effect.
I require more sleep than ever and have rested
very well since my return to home comforts.
After putting my house affairs in train,
I rode up to Mrs B.s, took my graduated dress.
Left it for her to cut out and fit.
Walked to see mother, sat an hour with her
dark clouds sent me home.
Catharine has not returned.
Mother looks pale, but seems in good spirits.
She is always pleasant & lovely in her manners.
Laura busy trimming her little girls
bonnets. Henry put me in a stage.
I mended Remsens wescoat, & coat.

Prepared my black silk to be trimmed. Ann assisted.
Dined with the children. Mr H. seldom
gets home to dinner, comes in after the table
is cleared off. I regret this, but cannot alter the
dinner hour.
Louis went to ride on horseback, for his cold.
Mr H. took Remsen with Charley.
Julia went to her Aunt Bells,
walked all the way, she did not get to the Fair.
Practises [sic] her music to night, very closely.
I walked for exercise, alone as usual; no one to
molest, or trouble me.

Remsen manners give me great trouble, he
is so rude and impertinent in his remarks.
No one escapes his ill.humour, and nothing
seems to shame him, or reform the bad habit.
For this reason, knowing this growing evil, it was
my wish to place Louis & himself under the firm
restraints of a strangers rule. Even their father
cannot keep them in proper subjection, and the
peace of a cheerfull table, or fire.side is often
embittered by their gravelling, and improper beha.
viour. Affection, love, gentleness, kind, or consid.
erate feelings for others, a proper regard for the will
of their parents, all are disregarded by these thought.
less boys. Their sister cannot claim any kind.
ness from them, Louis, is rough, and selfish; and
Remsen has followed in his footsteps.
The servants are their laughing stock, every thing
[wounding] to their feelings, is too good a joke for these
cold hearted boys to lose.
Could I ever imagine my sons, in whom
I hoped to foster every kindly virtue, over whose
infant days, my whole care had been expended,
could I think, all lost, all my prayers in vain.
But hope still cheers me, and I bear this rude,
rough, unfeeling return, for my love & tenderness
with patience.
There seems a vain of sarcastic swearing, abusive
humour in all their remarks. Every friend,
every visitor, every acquaintance they meet, or
think their sister, or myself loves, must suffer
from two rude boys.
My ears are tired of this kind of conversation, and
I often retire to weep over their faults.
Finding fault with their meals, and a thousand
little faults, I can forgive; but a systematic hard.
ening of the heart, a deadness of natural affiction [sic]
a [disrelish] for the tender charities of life appal [sic]
me.
My duty as a parent constrains me to reprove,
if they inherit the faults of their parents, so
much stronger our duty compassion for their
sins.
Had they been trained under my system, all this
might have been spared. but without the Fear of
God, they will have no fear of man; and no
love for their fellow creatures..
Louis has come in my room, while I
am writing this, and I shall read it to him.
He seems to face the truth of my remarks.
I left him[,] went down to my sewing: he
insisted on keeping the gas, burning in my room.

On going to bed, I perceived through carelessness
he had put the burner too near the looking glass,
and cracked the plate, ruining the appearance of
my toilette. It is [the] second accident from Gas.

An impression of much interest.

Thursday. 21st
Charming, clear day.
Mr H. wanted to
sleep, but tore himself from his pillow, when the
bell rang; I indulged a few moments longer in bed.
Buckwheat cakes, and honey for breakfast.
A bath, went to walk, bought an article for Rem.
Grass mattress. $5.
Put his room in order, he must leave Julia’s room,
she wants it herself.
No calls this fine morning.
My cold almost well.
Rima, called to see Julia.

Friday. 22nd October. 1852.
Charming day.

I rode out with Mr H. a fine ride.
Rested on my return.
Mother & Maria came, sat an hour. both pale.
Julia went down to her Aunt Bell’s, tried to
persuade them to go with her to the Fair. Uncle F.
too much fatigued. She came in late to tea, I wished
her a companion, sister or friend to go with her to some
amusement. She is often lonely; Only daughters are often
desolate.