August 5, 11851 – “Tragedy strikes and with it, the guilt”

Tuesday. 5th Aug. 1851. Sing Sing.

Bright, and beautiful day. My father died
to day at 8 oclock. P.M.
Mr Hasbrouck, left in the cars
before nine. I walked on the road with Henry; we talked of
home; and our poor sick father; little did we know at
that very hour, he was breathing his last, but so it was;
between the hours of eight & nine; he fell asleep.

Henry went to his books on our return, and I went to my
sewing. Maria, and Julia walked down to the Cars; to see
their “father”, did not find him; walked over Dr Creightons
place. We dined, and. I went calmly to bed; fell asleep;
not feeling as strong as usual.
A loud knock at my door awoke me, and Henry’s voice,
shattered me from slumber. A few hurried words told
all; our poor father was dead. Ferdinand came up in haste
to take Henry down to the house of mourning.
I promised to follow the next day, with the children, and
Maria. How great this blow, so long expected, and yet so
sudden at last. I could not sleep, or eat, and thought only
of the poor suffer, whom I had neglected to visit to the last.
Could I have called back the past, my reproaches would have
been spared. How much Catharine deceived me, H. also.

August 7, 1851 – “The mourning begins”

Thursday. 7th August. 1851

Very close morning, showers at noon.
We took a late breakfast, I could not eat
a mouthful, my taste gone; and ________ feeble from excitement.
Mother & Catharine, both slept. during the night.
A carriage came to take me to shop. We went to a mourning
store in Broadway, and bought our Mourning;. “Mrs Mayer’s” .
A gingham, berege, and muslin, each, fans, & collars. 21$.
I returned home faint; left the bundle at Mrs Bloodgood’s.
Maria H. & Julia, remained down town; went to the house.
I took some brandy & water, and ate some crackers;
it revived me. Slept a few minutes.
Rain fell in torrents, we dined at two. The girls came home
in a carriage. At four we bid adieu, and took the cars
for Sing Sing. Mother felt sad, a tearfull farewell, poor soul.
She will miss her kind protector. An [irreparable] loss to her.
We reached home in a shower, Mrs Swain
had gone to meet us in our carriage, but we missed each other.
I slept soundly to.night, Mr H composed my mind;
Could I look on him in death; this thought haunted my mind

August 2, 3 and 4th, 1851 – “An unwanted visitor and a trip to Sing Sing prison”

Tags

,

Saturday. 2nd August. 1851.

A fine day. not too warm or cool.
I awoke too late for health this lovely morning.
Walked a mile with Henry. Mrs Swain & Julia rode to Sing Sing for Mr
Swain and his niece, Louis drove. A letter from Catharine, she thinks
father much better; the city cool and all the rest well.
A surprise today, after dinner as we were talking of Maria H.[Hasbrouck]
and I hoping she would defer her visit, she made her appearance
coming alone from Rondout. had she waited two weeks later,
it would have suited us better, our accommodations being limited.
I dislike a large family, and confusion, it upsets my nerves.
Could not get my usual sleep; my heart beat loud and long.
Poor Mrs Swain, looks for a young lady, from the city; to pass some
days. another trouble; I pity the little soul from my heart; but
our confusion will not last long, thank fortune.
Maria occupies a little corner room; very pleasant; only
the boys laugh at her Cot.
G. arrived to a late tea, seems very well, and cool as usual.
I am infected by his frigidity. A dark cloud in the horizon.
Singular dispositions, the H.’s & family have, all so similar.

Sunday. 3rd August. 1851.
Beautiful day.
Mr H. took our carriage full to
Church. Mr Frainer, preached his first sermon. They were pleased
with Mr F. G liked him much; he shook hands with all.
We did not get down the hill. Henry remained at home all day.
I rode to Tarry town after tea. I was unhappy this morning
but, turn my thoughts to other hopes; Tears are for the earth.

Monday, 4th August. 1851.
A fine day.
Garret took me a charming ride through
Sleepy hollow; I spoke to Mrs Horton.
He insisted on my going through, the Prison at Sing Sing in the
afternoon, we all went. Mr Hale escorted the party. I was not pleased
but felt a dread of something. We were introduced to Tom Wetherby.
The prisoners look pale and dejected, all at work.
Niles and the “Confidence Man” conspicuous. Every thing neat & clean.

August 1, 1861 – “Thoughts on the summer in Sing Sing”

Tags

Friday. 1st of August. 1851 Sing Sing.

Delightful day, a proper temperature for comfort.

Our last summer month is here, how
soon the season go by. Four weeks yesterday since.
we left home, I am very well, much stronger and better
than usual. Hope to keep my health until my return
if Providence wills it so.
I am satisfied with this place, and should not like to go
back to the old farm of Mr L’s. We are more alone
here, the family is small; our rooms pleasant and “airy.”
We have taken our usual walk to Reymes farm this
morning, Henry goes with us; he is much stronger, and
looks much better.
I look for Mr H. to.morrow, he is a sad run away, and I
think may prolong his stay; if he enjoys himself.
Perhaps Maria, will return with him, to visit us; at all.
events I hope to see him to.morrow. or before.
We rode before tea to Tarry.town. left Remsen in the
woods, had some trouble to find him. Met the Leggetts; they
told us he was on the aqueduct. Louis rode on horseback after
tea. Julia and Miss Davis, went to call on Miss Wetherby; her
brother escorted them home.
I read untill ten oclock, a Novel by George Sands, First, and
true love” a tiresome, wordy production.

July 31, 1851 – “Louis drives Henry to Tarrytown”

Thursday. 31st July. 1851.
Cool, and fall. like day.
We find a change from
the heat of the last month; and complain now of chills.
I love this cool, and sleep sweetly through the night. Henry
is a frozen house plant; but I send him to ride, and try to make
a Man. Louis drove him to Tarry.town, they returned to dinner
bringing some candies & nuts.
I sewed industriously all the morning; finished the last
shirt. Slept an hour after dinner, had a pain in my stomach.
At four we went up to Mrs Leggetts to tea, spent a pleasant
afternoon. Eliza gave us a fine supper of good thing, her bread
and tongue delightfull. The old people look well, as bright as ever.
Julia, sang for them in the evening. A large audience.
Will Legget escorted us home.
Henry remained with Mrs Swain.
Margaret washed some things to.day. dressed etc. Mrs Hoyt
would cost too much, if I give her all our clothes. Small articles
we do at home; Mrs S, has no objection.